Why We Need Genetic Engineering
The human race has gone soft. We’re no longer as strong or as fierce as our ancestors were. The average human brain size has been steadily decreasing for the last 20,000 years, from 1,500 cc to about 1,350 cc, meaning we’ve lost a tennis-ball-sized chunk of our think-organ (Hawkes, 2010). According to David Geary of the University of Missouri, this is because we killed almost all of our natural predators in our genocidal quest for a seat at the top of the food chain, and in the process removed much-needed selective pressure that acted as a quality control mechanism for our species. Today, with tools like CRISPR and Cas9 at our disposal, we have the ability to create newer, better predators. We owe it to ourselves as a species to create newer, better predators, for the betterment of the human race. To re-introduce much-needed selection pressure and kick human evolution back into high gear.
Hopping Piranha Frogs could be made using the base genome of a Latimeria cholumnae (the West-Indian coelacanth) or Neoceratodus forsteri (the Queensland lungfish), with the genes responsible for their lobe-fins augmented with the genes that encourage the limb buds of Lithobates catesbeianus (American bullfrog) tadpoles to grow into frog legs, and the genes for their craniodental development augmented with Pygocentrus piraya (black piranha) genes.
Sharkodiles could be created by a similar process, with the projecting jaws of Mitsukurina owstoni (the goblin shark) augmented with genes from Crocodylus porosus (the saltwater crocodile), warm-bloodedness borrowed from Carcharodon carcharias (the great-white shark), and great size using growth genes from a saltwater croc or a great white.
Skullpeckers could be made by taking brain-eating woodpeckers like Melanerpes uropygialis (the gila woodpecker) and making them far more aggressive toward humans.
Skeeter-Birds could be created by breeding iron-deficient, infra-red-sensing hummingbirds with a thirst for warm blood.
Hyenabats would resemble miniature hyenas (genus Crocuta) with the wings of Acerodon jubatus (the giant golden-crowned flying fox).
Monstrous orc-like creatures could be made by adding bear-like claws from Ursus arctos (the North American brown bear) as well as snouts and tusks from Phacochoerus africanus (the warthog) to the base genome of Gorilla beringei (the Eastern gorilla), and then modifying it to grow to the size of Ursus arctos middendorffi (the Kodiak bear).
Carnivorous Porcuskunks could be made by adding the spine-coding genes from Hystrix cristata (the crested porcupine) as well as the stink-gland genes from Mephitis mephitis (the skunk) to the base genome of Gulo gulo (the wolverine).
Flying spiders could be made by combining insect and arachnid DNA.
Colonial Ants could perhaps be made that would nest in human colons.
The possibilities are endless! As the wise John Hammond once said, “how can we stand in the light of discovery, and not act?!” (Jurassic Park, 1993)
Some would say that on the issue of genetic engineering, scientists have a responsibility to defer to prevailing social mores. However, by combining the DNA of social animals like orcas or humans with the DNA of the Roman eel or some other member of the family Muraenidae, we could be the ones with the prevailing social morays.
In an age when people are becoming increasingly dependent on medications and human longevity and over-population are at an all-time high, it would be negligent of us not to do something to curb these disturbing trends. We owe it to future generations to create stronger, faster, smarter predators, to forge the best quality generations of future humans that we can. We need to make better predators for our future, that our children and our children’s children will be the best humans they can be. We need to make better predators, for the children.